Family of 3 :)

Hello from the Kimmel home of 3 - (plus Chulo of course).

First, I cannot thank everyone enough for your continuous thoughts, messages, phone calls & prayers!! I want to apologize for 'falling off the face of the earth' and not responding to very many messages. The past week has been quite the adventure and although we faced some trials, I would do it all over again for our sweet boy. -- not the HUGE baby everyone thought he would be. ;)
I hope all of you will accept my apologies for not being able to juggle everything that was happening and respond to your gracious calls & messages. Please know they were all very much appreciated and the encouragement really helped me get through the trials we faced. I'm sure you all understand what I'm saying but I still felt as though I should apologize for not showing my appreciation sooner.

There have been lots of questions about the circumstances that have unfolded this past week and what landed us a 6 night!! stay in the hospital. In the big picture, the things you will read in this update are not big deals at all and I don't want it to sound like I'm not grateful because I am beyond appreciative of our little blessing. However, as a new mother, you only want what is best for your child and its the hardest thing in the world when you cannot provide what they need.

 As you know from previous emails, I was given the first round of cirvadil on Friday night, 7/15. Each round has 12 hours to work its magic. On 9:30 Saturday morning nothing had happened. Another round of cirvadil was administered and as of 10pm Saturday night, I was about 2cm and 70 percent effaced. Baby William was very content!! I was already pretty frustrated and even contemplated asking for a c-section at that point but I REALLY wanted to have Will naturally for several reasons. The 3rd round of Cirvadil (given around 11pm on Saturday night) was more productive and I started to have stronger contractions which lead me to be about 90 percent effaced and almost 3 cm by 9am sunday morning. Pitocin (which causes stronger contractions) was given to me about that time. By 1pm I needed the epidural for the pain and that worked wonders, as expected! I began to progress faster for a few hours but then that progress completely STALLED around 5cm. Nothing else was happening! My Dr recommended a c-section at this point. Not what I had hoped for because of the recovery that is involved. However, I agreed because although Will tolerated all of the drugs and induction process very nicely and kept a strong heart rate, I didn't want to risk anything by waiting any longer. They prepped me for the c-section, Brad put on his scrubs & our precious boy made his entrance into this world at 6:39pm on 7/17/11. He weighed 7lbs 9.8 ounces and is 19 inches long. Needless to say, we were instantly in LOVE!

I honestly don't remember too much about the first night and when I look at the photos, I can see why! I look like I was put through a clothes wringer & then hit by a very large truck. I am still thankful for the photos though! :) I remember kissing Will for the first time and the joy that rushed over me to see that he was here and healthy! I also somewhat remember some very dear friends and my supportive family members (YES! even my dad!) were there to welcome William when we made it to our room after surgery.

I thought monday was a pretty good day considering the few days prior. Will fed well the first night but Monday brought some problems with getting Will to eat. I am very determined to breast feed and I had already told myself that it was going to be a lot of work and I have to stay positive. Will just couldn't get a good latch. On Tuesday the pediatrician & lactation consultant said that Will was "tongue tied" and he had to have his frenulum cut to get a better latch. Will was also circumcised on Tuesday. Those two things are to be expected but what I didn't expect is that my milk would still not be in to feed Will. The Pediatrician stopped by on Tuesday night to let us know that Will had jaundice. I got really emotional. I know jaundice is common but I was exhausted and of course no mother wants to hear that their baby is not doing well. His level on Tuesday evening was a 10. He had to be treated with a billi rubin blanket for the next 12 hours. Its a little piece of glowing board that is placed under the baby's back. It made him look like a very adorable glow worm but it was still hard to see! He had to wear goggles to protect his eyes. It was hard to see him like that but I knew it would help treat his jaundice. When Will was weighed on Tuesday night, he had lost 10 percent of his birth weight, down to 6lbs, 13 ounces. Due to the jaundice and the maximum amount of weight they like to see a baby lose, the Pediatrician suggested I start supplementing with formula. This was NOT what I wanted to hear! Of course there are some people that have very strong opinions about not supplementing and hearing these negative comments only hurts my heart even more. Its not what I had planned but not everything always goes as planned. I had heard stories about supplementing and I didn't want to cause further confusion for baby Will as he was learning to breastfeed. Under MUCH hesitation I agreed to 20cc's of formula on Tuesday night and once again on Wednesday morning (after breastfeeding). At this point, I figured a little bit might help but I was still very sad about this and felt like I couldn't give my son what he needed to thrive.

We thought we might be able to go home on Wednesday but unfortunately the Jaundice worsened to a level 13 by Wed morning. The Dr explained that the levels peak at 48 hours so the higher level was not surprising but needed more serious treatment. They told us that Will had to go under a table lamp and could not be held other than for feedings. This was heartbreaking. Will kept pulling off his goggles (little monkey fingers like his daddy!) and this was dangerous because the light is so harsh. They really need to design a better process! Wednesday night we learned that Will's weight had dropped some more, at this point he weighed 6lbs, 9 ounces. A whole pound less than when he was born, a 14% loss and this caused concern by the Doctors. Brad and I were very discouraged at this point. My milk is still not in and the pediatrician advised at least 20-30 cc's of formula after each feeding. The pediatrician explained that Will does not have very much "brown fat" to keep him warm so he works extra hard to regulate his body temperature. The jaundice is also a lose/lose situation for a baby that is losing weight and only makes it worse because the heat lamps suck all of the hydration out of them. The Dr described it as if we worked out and didn't keep ourselves hydrated, Will had not been given enough liquid fuel to flush the jaundice, regulate his body temp and gain weight. Wednesday night was tough and Brad and I had to keep a close eye on Will so he didn't pull his mask off under the bright light. It was amazing how Will was able to keep doing that! Very scary. Needless to say, we didn't sleep well. Will was so unhappy at times that I took him out from under the lamp and held him to calm him down.

Thursday brought good news when we learned that the jaundice level went back down to a 10 which is much better for a baby around 72 hours old. Will had more poopy diapers on Wed so the formula combined with my breast "milk" & the heat lamp did what it needed to do to treat the jaundice. We were able to bring little William home and although the nurses & care at the hospital were pretty great, we were ready to get home and adjust to our new lives with baby Will.

We arrived home around 2:30 yesterday and spent some time introducing Chulo to baby Will. Chulo isn't quite sure what to think but is VERY interested in every peep that Will makes. Chulo doesn't like it when Will cries and gets very nervous. Overall Chulo has been great and only had one episode that frustrated us. He jumped on me and for those of you that have had a c-section, you can imagine how incredibly painful that was. Chulo felt horrible after he saw me cry and has been a well behaved dog ever since.

Although breastfeeding continues to be a challenge, I am determined to work through it and am anxious for my breastmilk to come in so we can stop supplementing Will with formula! I have an appointment with a lactation consultant on Monday and I'm hoping it comes in before then. The lactation consultants at the hospital were helpful but theres just not a lot I can do if my body is not producing what it is supposed to. I am told that it usually comes in between 3-5 days. Today is day 5 so lets pray it happens soon!

The pure love we feel for baby Will is more than I could have ever imagined. I knew I would love him more than anything but this level of love is something I never knew existed. All I want to do is provide for him and make sure he has everything he needs to thrive. Brad and I could not be happier with our little guy at home. We look forward to all of the adventures he will bring us. The challenges will only make us stronger! We appreciate all of the love & support you have given us. William is very lucky to have so many loving friends & relatives! You are the people that will help us shape him into the person he is meant to be. We thank you from the bottom of our hearts -

I will be sending a link with photos soon!!

Suzie, Brad & sweet baby William :-)